Speaking Your Best (TM) Accent Reduction and Communication Skills Training
  • Home
  • Blog
  • About Us
    • Testimonials and Clients
    • Policies
  • Zoom/Skype Classes
    • speech assessment
    • SYB 7-Week Course
    • SYB 12-Week Program
    • SYB 24-Week Accent Reduction Course
  • Informational Articles
  • Accent Guides
    • Chinese Accent Reduction/Chinese Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Indian Accent Reduction/Indian Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Japanese Accent Reduction/Japanese Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Russian Accent Reduction/Russian Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Spanish Accent Reduction/Spanish Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Arabic Accent Reduction/Arabic Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • Portuguese Accent Reduction/Portuguese Accent Reduction Made Easy
    • French Accent Reduction/French Accent Reduction Made Easy
  • Contact Us

Do Your Facial Expressions Give Your True Feelings Away (when you don't want them to)?

9/3/2015

0 Comments

 
Our faces are often what most people notice first about us when we speak.  Some people notice the eyes and eyebrows, while others notice the mouth or even head movements (such as nodding).

Many people don’t pay much attention to the facial expressions and head movements they use when they speak.  They can’t understand why their listeners get confused or ask them questions about what they really mean or how they truly feel.  Because our facial expressions make up an important part of our body language, we want to make sure that they match our intended message.  

If you are someone who doesn’t give body language much thought, then this article is for you.  Using the correct facial expressions and head movements to express yourself effectively and accurately is essential for everyone, both in their business and personal lives.

Let’s take a look at this social scenario.  You are at a social gathering at a friend’s house and start a conversation with a new person.  While they are telling you all about their recent vacation and how much fun they had, you can’t help but notice that there is something in their hair that is driving you nuts.  You frown because you can’t figure out what it is, not realizing that the person speaking sees your frown and gets the impression that you either don’t agree with what they are saying or are offending them in some way. What a disaster!  How do you recover from that?  You don’t really know this person, so it’s not like you can just pick out that bothersome thing out of their hair.  Do you apologize and tell the person that there is something in their hair, risking the fact that you haven’t listened to a word they said, or do you just let it go?  The damage is already done, isn't it?

Here’s a business scenario that will most likely ring a bell with just about everyone.  You are a manager and are running an important meeting.  Your job is this meeting is to listen to the members of your team as they give their updates on their projects.  The person giving their update has made too many mistakes, and you are upset. You purse your lips while they are in the middle of their update, which the person clearly sees.  Is this what you want your employee to see?  NO!  As a manager, it is important that you stay calm and neutral, even when  someone says something that angers or upsets you.  Each situation is a problem to be solved, and you should not let your negative feelings show.  You can choose to discuss the employee’s errors during the meeting or set up a time to discuss it at a later date. Either way, maintaining a neutral expression is the best way to go.

Now, last but not least, have you ever noticed that some people shake their head “no” when they are saying something positive? This is a contradiction, isn’t it?  Let’s say the person is making a positive comment, such as, “I really love your home” but is shaking their head from side to side as they say it.  What are you supposed to think about that?  Do you believe them, or do they really mean that they don’t like your home?  Sometimes, it's just hard to know what the person really means, isn't it?

Because facial expressions and head movements are very important parts of how others perceive our meaning, we need to be conscious of what we do with our eyes, eyebrows, mouth and head.  The worst thing is to be misunderstood, as that could lead to all kinds of problems.  Practice speaking in front of a mirror to help you become more aware of how you look when you say something positive and negative.  You might be surprised at what you see! 

 
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Picture

    Author

    Cheryl Posey is a licensed and nationally certified speech/language pathologist.   She specializes in accent reduction and communication skills training and provides useful tips and suggestions to help you improve your spoken English and reduce your accent with articles from Speaking Your Best's blog.  Subscribe today so that you don't miss any articles!

    Archives

    June 2020
    May 2020
    September 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    January 2019
    November 2018
    September 2018
    July 2018
    March 2018
    January 2018
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    February 2016
    January 2016
    October 2015
    September 2015
    June 2015
    February 2015


    Categories
    Accent Reduction 
    Accent Reduction Classes 
    Accent Reduction Online 
    Accent Reduction Specialists 
    American Accent Training 
    ​
    American English Pronunciation 
    American Idioms Using The Word "up" 
    Common American Expressions 
    Communication Skills 
    Improve Spoken English 
    Improving Presentation Skills 
    Improving Public Speaking 
    Improving Vocabulary Skills 
    Presentation Tips 
    Pronounce The "r" Sound 
    Public Speaking Tips 
    Reduce Accent 
    Skype classes
    Small Talk 
    Speak Like An American 
    Spoken English 
    Understanding The American Culture 
    Vocabulary 
    Vocabulary Building 

    All

    RSS Feed

Cheryl Posey, MS CCC-SLP
speakingyourbest@gmail.com
774-212-3241


Copyright 2005-2023
Proudly powered by Weebly