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How Texting and Acronyms are Affecting Communication Skills                 Do You LOL When Texting Your BFF?    

6/18/2015

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My, how the world of communication has changed in recent years!  Remember when we used to use a real telephone to call our friends, we actually wrote letters to people, we went to our friend’s house and knocked on their door to speak with them, and we actually had real conversations?   All that is now changing, especially with young adults. With the development of smart phones, iPads, Facebook, My Space, Twitter, mini iPads, and tablets, the “old” way of communicating is experiencing some big changes.  Texting, emails and messaging are replacing phone calls and are turning into acronyms, new slang, and single words and phrases with no punctuation or capital letters. 

Acronyms are not only appearing in texts and messages, some are actually being adopted into the Oxford English Dictionary as acceptable words. LOL (laugh out loud), OMG (Oh, my God), BFF (best friends forever), and IMHO (in my humble opinion), are among 900 new words and slang recently added to this dictionary.  If we are to keep up with the times, we have to quickly learn and understand the latest acronyms, just we can understand what others are saying.  One almost needs decryption software just to decipher some of the new and popular acronyms used today!

Have you noticed that many people don’t have house phones anymore? They just have cell phones (which they hardly answer).  More often than not, rather than calling someone on the phone, they text the person they want to talk to.  This is quicker and they don’t have to deal with actually having to talk to them in person.  The result is an impersonal message filled with acronyms, short phrases and abbreviations for words that sometimes need some translation efforts before the message is understood correctly.  Today’s youth and adults are beginning to lose their social communication skills.

Let's take a look at a sample text that two people might have and what it might look like.  
Speaker 1: sup? 
Speaker 2: brb 
Speaker 1: o rly? Np 
Speaker 2: back 
Speaker 1: k movie?
Speaker 1: w/e 
Speaker 2: otoh, dinner? 
Speaker 1:  ROFL
Speaker 2: ROFL 
Speaker 1:  Call u L8R 
Speaker 2:  xoxo <3 

Ok, now what does the above text actually mean in real language?
Speaker 1:  What's up?
Speaker 2: Hold on a minute, I'll be right back.
Speaker 1: Oh, really?  No problem.
Speaker 2:  I'm back.
Speaker 1:  Ok, do you want to go to a movie?
Speaker 2:  It doesn't matter, whatever you want.  On the other hand, it might be nice to go out for dinner.
Speaker 1:  That is so funny, I'm laughing!
Speaker 2:  Me, too!
Speaker 1:  I'll call you later.
Speaker 2:  hugs and kisses

While we all need to change with the times, it becomes worrisome to see that many people’s social language and written language skills are declining.  We are too often in a hurry to get things done and do not or will not to take the time to engage in real conversations.  Texting is shorter, more convenient, and takes much less effort than a live conversation.  Our language skills are deteriorating, and many people do not even realize it.  Texting terms and acronyms are spilling into emails we write and some students and adults are experiencing difficulty constructing cohesive written documents with correct grammar and punctuation.  Modern technology is a wonderful thing, and I am all for it.  I can text with the best of them.  However, we must remember that effective communication is the key to success and avoid the pitfalls the convenience of modern technology provides.
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Common American Idioms Using the Word “Time”                                      Do You Have the Time to Learn Them or Are You So Pressed for Time That You Have No Spare Time At All?

6/18/2015

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These days, it seems that everyone is in such a hurry with everything in their lives! We don't give ourselves any downtime, or take time out to enjoy ourselves. Time after time, we seem to be spending too much time at work and not enough time with our families. We have difficulty finding the time to take a vacation, we are always on a timetable with deadlines to meet, meetings to attend, and promotions to get.

Not too long ago, the world was a different place. There were no computers, smartphones or tablets, and many people worked at a slower pace rather than always rushing. Employees arrived to work on time and left at a set time, so that they could get home to their families. These days, depending on the job we have, some employees have a hard time leaving work at a reasonable hour, staying at work until the wee hours of the night. Everyone needs to have some spare time.

Time sure flies by when we are busy, doesn't it? Not only are adults busy with work, but children are just as busy with school, outside activities and sports. It seems that every minute of our day is planned for us. In today's, fast-paced, hectic, whirlwind of a world, it's always a fight against time.

At one time or another, we have all felt the pressure of too many schedules and things to do. The feeling of not having time to catch our breath can be a good thing once in a while, but not such a good thing when our schedules run our lives. None of us wants to have too much time on our hands and be bored, but wouldn't be nice if we could relax a little more outside of work and do some of the things we really enjoy?

Maybe it's time for a change! We all know that major changes don't happen overnight, but we can make changes a little at a time. Adding one or two activities per month, such as relaxing with a good book, going to a movie or planning a family day would be great ways to begin. I know I don't want to feel as though every time I turn around I have another project or scheduled activity to attend!

There's no time like the present to make changes in our lives and to learn how to have a whale of a time enjoying our free time!

To learn more about Speaking Your Best, visit our website at 
http://www.speakingyourbest.com
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Want to Have a Great Presentation?  Tell a Story!

6/18/2015

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In the business world, so many of us are required to give presentations and engage our audiences.  There is usually a lot of information to present, and we are left wondering how we can connect with our audience and leave a lasting impression.  How do we make our presentations memorable?  After all, there is nothing more boring than someone showing us charts and spitting out numbers and percentages.  

While there are obviously important facts that are mandatory, remember that a presentation is really a way to “talk” to your audience and let them become a part of your message.  What better way to do that than to tell a story?

So, how do you do create a story that makes your audience truly interested in what you have to say and want to hear more?

Your story must be relevant and fit your audience.
Telling just any story won’t make a great presentation.  You need to make sure that our story is relevant to your topic and fits your audience.  You want to the audience to respond with an “oh!” or “ahhh”, or be surprised in a way that really gets their attention.  

Your story must have a point
You want to build the story right into our presentation framework so that it is something they can relate to and makes practical sense. The point of the story must be clear.  Rather than just spitting out numbers and charts, make it realistic and fun.  The story puts everything together so that all of those numbers and all of the information make sense.  

Make your audience laugh
If your story is funny, that’s even better. Sometimes, you might want to relate something that actually happened to you that was funny and relevant to your project.  This keeps the audience engaged and interested. 

Always tell a story about a person and an experience they had.
Your story can be a success story, a failure, a humorous story, or something personal.  You may even want your story to have a lesson for others to learn.  If your story doesn’t have a personal message, then it won’t hit home with your audience. They should reflect on how the story affected someone and how it relates to the topic.

It’s not enough just to present information in a presentation, as it tends to make it dry and dull.  Spicing it up with a story or two that are relevant to your topic, teaching a lesson and saying something funny all help to engage your audience and keep them asking for more.  Your presentation is a way to deliver a message in the most interesting way possible so that they walk away actually remembering what you said, the important information and practical ways to use it.  
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Use Melody, Not Speaking Rate and Loudness, to Show Emotions

6/18/2015

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When we speak, there is much more to our message than just the words we say.  Our melody, sometimes referred to as stressing and intonation, plays a significant role in how others interpret what we say.  This is how our pitch goes up and down to convey our message.  

Another way to show emotion is in our speaking rate.  We associate someone who speaks quickly as being excited and sometimes inexperienced, while someone who speaks very slowly might be viewed negatively as someone who is boring or unintelligent.  

Speaking volume also tells a great deal about us. A very soft-spoken person may be viewed as insecure, while a person who speaks very loudly all the time may be viewed as someone who appears angry for no apparent reason.  

The best speakers of English speak using approximately 150 words per minute.  Broken down, it comes to 2.5 words per second.  If we focus on maintaining that rate during all speaking situations, whether we are angry, upset, excited, happy, or sad, can we still show our emotions effectively?  Of course we can!  

A person who keeps their cool under pressure and who can handle difficult situations without showing negative emotions are people who are most successful and are those that most of us try to emulate. 

We do not need to speak quickly or too loudly to show excitement, we can do it with our tone or melody.  We’ve all heard the expression that some people wear their emotions on their sleeves, which means that their emotions are transparent or that they show them easily, while other people, not so much.  Some people speak without emotion to the point where we can’t tell how they feel. While we don’t want to sound overdramatic all the time, it is equally undesirable not to show any emotions at all.  

Our melody should reflect our situation and our audience.  Let’s take for example a business manager who has a meeting with his team.  He is upset because their project is behind schedule.  Because he tends to show his emotions easily, he raises his voice and speaks very quickly when showing his anger and disappointment.  When yelling, all of the words he says are emphasized.  Maybe he says something like, “WE HAVE TO DO BETTER IF WE ARE GOING TO SUCCEED!” (The words in caps represent emphasized words).  What does his team think of him?  They think that he is a “hot head” who is unapproachable, both qualities being equally undesirable.  While having authority and control is an obvious strength for a leader, trying to obtain it in this way leads to disaster.

Let’s take the same scenario now with a business manager who is talking with his team about his unhappiness about their performance on their project and approach it from another angle. He speaks in a calm voice maintaining an appropriate speed and stresses the positive words he wants his team members to remember.  We will use the same sentence as before, but say it as follows: “We HAVE to do BETTER if we are going to SUCCEED.” (the words in caps represent emphasized words).  Now the team’s perception of their manager is much different.  They know that things are not going well, but because the manager stayed calm and spoke in a professional manner, they can now move on to solving the problem.  The team will be more motivated and want to please their manager more when treated with respect.  

In any professional or personal situation, we should all try to remember these important tips:  avoid yelling every time we find ourselves in a difficult situation, maintain our sense of calm by speaking at a consistent, appropriate rate, and emphasize the most important words we want people to remember.  Speaking too quickly, yelling, and stressing every word during an argument or difficult situation means we are out of control, and that is the last quality we want others to associate with us.

 
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Did You Know That People Really Do Hear Grammar Mistakes? I Know It, But He Don't!

6/18/2015

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Let's face it, even the best speakers make grammar mistakes from time to time. We are human and with that comes imperfections. It's just the way things are. Minor grammar errors are common and don't really have a significant impact on our spoken English. We all make minor errors such as, "a apple" instead of "an apple" and "all kind of things" instead of "all kinds of things." Having said that, there are some glaring grammar errors that you should make sure you never make. These are errors that will make many people cringe when they hear and may create a negative impression.

In this article, we will focus on what we call "subject-verb agreement." In English, the rule is that the subject of the sentence (what the sentence is about) always has to agree with the verb (the action of the sentence). In simple terms, this means that there is a specific form of a verb for every subject, the subjects being I, you, he, she, it, we, they. When the subject and the verb do not agree, this is a very noticeable grammar error and should be avoided at all costs.

The most common error is made with what we call the third person singular form of a verb in the present tense. The third person singular form refers to "he", "she" and "it." Many of the errors occur with the verb "to do" (do, does, did). The verb that goes with this form always has to have an "s" at the end, so for the verb "to do", the correct form would be "does."

Let's look at an example: 
This sentence is correct: "She doesn't know them." The pronoun "she" is the subject and the helping verb "doesn't" (does not) is the correct form that goes or agrees with it. The form "does" agrees with "she" because it has an "s" at the end of it, as third person singular forms must have.

Many people, however, do not use the correct form of the verb when using the third person singular present tense.. 
This sentence is not correct: "She don't (do not) know them." The pronoun "she" is the subject, but this time the helping verb "do" is used, which does not have an "s" at the end of it. The form "do" is used with all subjects, including "I", "you", "we" and "they." The only one it is never used with is the third person singular form, including "he", "she" and 'it."

In summary, there are minor grammar errors that most of us notice but overlook. Because so many people make them, they are becoming more acceptable in informal everyday conversational speech. Then, there are some major grammar errors that are very noticeable and may stereotype us as to our educational or socio-economic level. Forming the third person singular present tense verb incorrectly certainly gives our listener a negative impression and may even be a deciding factor in obtaining a job in which public speaking is important.
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    Cheryl Posey is a licensed and nationally certified speech/language pathologist.   She specializes in accent reduction and communication skills training and provides useful tips and suggestions to help you improve your spoken English and reduce your accent with articles from Speaking Your Best's blog.  Subscribe today so that you don't miss any articles!

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Cheryl Posey, MS CCC-SLP
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774-212-3241


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